Introduction, Part 2

We have been just in the introduction of this lesson, God's hope for your home. We will be here for at least one more week just in the introduction. And the introduction lays the framework by which we will address each particular member of the family. And if you don't understand the introduction, the beginning part, then the rest of it begins to fall apart. So you begin at the beginning, understanding what God says about your home, and understanding what he says is the hope.

for that home and then dealing with the people in that home on an individual basis. And that's where we're going to go over the next few weeks. But our homes are hurting tremendously, not just in America, but in the church of Jesus Christ. They're hurting terribly. And while you will go to some churches and go to some seminars and read some books, the things you're going to hear over the next few weeks are things that you probably won't at other churches, and you probably won't read about them in books, because most people just won't be honest about what is happening in your home life.

If they're not honest about that, then they can't address the issues that are there. We want to be able to attack those issues from a biblical standpoint in order that we might live as God wants us to live. So we're attempting to understand your home, and we begin at the beginning. And last week we began with talking about how you're a home. is attacked by the adversary. That's where it all begins. If you have problems in your home, you must understand that your home is constantly being attacked by Satan.

We talked about that last week. Number two, we talked about how they were manipulated by the media. Oh, they are, aren't they? Listen, if you spend as much time as you do watching television, it's going to shape your way of thinking, isn't it? minutes. Do this next week. Do this. For every hour you watch television, spend an hour in the Word of God. Just try that out, just for one week, not two, not three, just one week. I want you to try that. For every hour of television you watch, I want you to spend an hour reading and spending the Word of God, and you watch what happens.

We'll spend two, three, four, five hours a night watching TV. And not think anything about it. A harmless sitcom, the news, you know, a sporting event, whatever it is. And I'm all for watching sporting events, and I'm all for watching the news, and I'm all for watching television. I'm not against watching TV. I mean, I don't think that that's, you know, Satan looking right back at you there. You know, I think you ought to watch television every once in a while. I'm not against that, but listen, if you spend four or five hours a night doing it, if you spend four or five hours of night doing anything, it's going to change your life, right?

You spend four or five hours a night exercising? Guess what? You're going to be tip-top shape by the end of the month, right? Absolutely. You spend four or five hours of night eating, guess what? Man, you're going to be this big, man. You're going to be huge. So if you spend that much time doing anything, it's going to change your life. So do yourself a favor. For every hour of television you watch, spend an hour in the Word of God and watch what happens. Our minds are being manipulated by the media.

whether it's Temptation Island, Big Brother 2, Survivor, Weakest Link, who wants to be a millionaire? I don't care what it is you're watching. They're all coming in to the mind and they're subtly controlling our decision-making process. The next thing you know, that which governs our decisions is not the scripture, but society. Be careful. Our minds are being manipulated. by the media. They're being controlled by the culture. That's number three.

We talked about that last week. The Lord said, love not the world. Neither the things that are in the world, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, the point of life or the world. And the world's passing away and the lust thereof. But he who does the will of God abides forever. So we've got to be careful, right? But we are being controlled by our culture. If our minds are manipulated by the media, because they're being attacked by the adversary, then our lives will be controlled by our culture.

And culture is constant change. It's always changing, right? Always changing. Who doesn't change? Jesus Christ. His word doesn't change. It's the same. It's the same. Because there has to be some constant. There has to be some stabilizing factor that we could always hold on to. That's the anchor for our soul, And that is the Lord Jesus Christ and His Word. And it never changes. So instead of fluctuating with the culture, we are to change culture. We change it. Because we are aliens and strangers in a foreign land.

We are the pilgrims just passing through. And therefore our minds need to be controlled by Christ, not by the culture. Our minds can no longer be manipulated by the media. but they must be mastered by the Lord God of the universe. And then we went to our fourth point and looked at the fact that our homes are being crushed by conflict. They are. The contentions, the anger. There are so many homes where we don't even, husbands don't want to go home at night and wives don't want them to come home. Children don't want to go home from school because of the anger that has arisen in the home.

It is so great, it's so powerful. There's nothing but fighting and bickering and arguing all the time. We looked at that last week in Proverbs 18 and talked about how destructive those arguments are, how they build barriers between one another. And for some families, there are so many bars of contention, so many barriers in between them. But it's going to take a long, long time. to break them down. We looked in Proverbs chapter 13 and understood that these whole arguments are caused because of our pride and our arrogance and begin to look at Proverbs chapter 15 in the connection between anger and contention in the home.

How arguments that have are so destructive. And then we looked at Proverbs 18, verse number 6, which talks about how angry men are given to blows and the physical abuse. the home, we're taking off and we're throwing things at one another, we're hitting one another. It's all because of pride and arrogance, but our homes are being crushed by conflict. And we live in a society today where there are just as many men being beaten up by their wives as there are women being beaten up by their husbands. It's an amazing scenario.

The tide is turned, and the women are getting bigger and stronger and weigh than the husbands and the family. The Bible over and over giving it. And I found it very interesting. I gave you some verses last week, and I went back and read them again, and I thought the repetition of something is incredible to me. Listen to Proverbs 19, verse number 13. It says this, A foolish son is destruction to his father, and the contentions of a wife are a constant dripping. We saw also how our homes are being divided by divorce.

that people are leaving for anything and everything. They don't care. They don't care if they have biblical grounds for divorce or not. They're just saying, you know what? Enough's enough. My parents divorced, they made it. You know what? I'm going to divorce. I'll make it. How many times have I heard that one? As if your parents are the example. Christ himself is the example. But our homes are being divided by divorce. right. People don't care if it's going to work or it's not going to work. You know what?

We can always get our walking papers. There's the door. Don't let it hit you on your way out. I don't have a ball and shayn around your foot. I'm not keeping you here. Go ahead. Get out of here. We hear that all the time. People just give up. They don't care. They don't want their marriages to work. And they'll leave for anything and everything. We saw last week. We're in Matthew 19. Why does that happen? Because of the hardness of man's heart. That's where we left off last week. Let me pick up her outline by looking at the next point and our homes are being devastated by demands.

Our homes are being devastated by demands. I'm not talking about the demands society places upon you. I'm not talking about the demands that your husband or the people around you make upon you. I'm talking about the demands in your home. Let me give an example.

Husbands are demanding that their wives act and look a certain way. They're demanding that the wife be a certain way. And she in return is demanding that he be a certain way. And they might not come out and say it, but they place demands on one another. You must do this. You must be this way. You must dress this way. You must act this way, you must speak this way, you must look that way. And we begin to put demands on one another. And we're not accepting one another for who we are and what we are.

We think that if we put demands on people, we're going to change them. Reminded the lady who said, you know, my husband, he wants me to be a certain way. I just can't compete with what he wants me to be. I can't compete with the playboy images he looks that constantly I can't look like that I'll never look like that I'll never be the perfect mate and so the perfect mate syndrome devastates the home why can't you look like her why can't you act like him why can't you lead like him oh I wish my husband was like that you need to take some lessons from him you need to go see him so you can be like that person.

Instead of praying for that person, that spouse of ours, in bringing them before the Lord. We don't accept them for who they are, for what they are. They have to be our way. Let me tell you something.

If they came out the way you wanted them to come out, you wouldn't love them then either. You'd always find something he didn't like. You're never going to find something. the perfect mate. Just doesn't happen. I take it back. Adam found the perfect mate. As soon as he had it, he ruined her, man, with sin. But, I mean, he had the perfect mate. I mean, she was created sinless. But you know what? Because we all sin will never be perfect. But again, you go back to how the media manipulates our way of thinking.

You know, when they want to sell something, They want to sell a car. They use the most beautiful women they could possibly find. You ever seen an ugly newscaster? No, man, they all got these big old dudes, man, wearing the most popular clothes. You're not going to put some 500-pound news anchor on. They're not going to do that. Nobody would watch it. Right? Sex sells. The world's not stupid. They know that. all of a sudden that begins to control our way of thinking and we begin to put demands on our wife why don't you look that way on her husband why don't you look that way lead that way we forget the Bible says Purpose 518 rejoice with the wife of your youth isn't that good it doesn't mean you rejoice with her why she's young you rejoice with her because from her youth you married her.

Rejoice with the wife God gave you. Next point. Our homes are being afflicted by attitudes, that is, bad attitudes. Specifically, unforgiving attitudes. But our homes are afflicted by attitudes of unforgiveness, bitterness, jealousy, rivalry. The attitudes that are not glorifying, to the Lord. The Bible says over in the book of Ephesians, the fourth chapter, the 31st verse, let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you along with all malice.

And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ Jesus has forgiven you. Let all bitterness be put away, all slander, anger, malice. Let it all be put away. And adopt a specific attitude, the attitude of kindness and tenderheartedness forgiving one another as God and Christ Jesus also. has forgiven us. You know, I got to tell you, there are so many homes that never get this. The bitterness that's there runs so deep that it's almost guaranteed there'll be no forgiveness extended to one spouse or the other.

That's so sad. So sad. But if you want to destroy your marriage, maintain your arrogance. Maintain the fact that you always have to be right. Maintain the fact that you are never wrong. And if you were, there must have been a mistake by somebody else. Because it wasn't your mistake. You're always the right one. Nobody likes to be wrong. everybody likes to be right but you're going to destroy your marriage and you keep on seeking to be right you want to help your marriage admit when you're wrong acknowledge the fact that you sinned and humbly seek forgiveness from the one you offended and begin to see how God breaks down the walls and barriers that have been erected because of your anger, your bitterness, and your jealousy.

Watch how God works. Next, our homes have been abandoned. They had been abandoned by actions. That is, we are no longer trustworthy. And therefore, the actions of untrustworthiness begin to be. to run rampant in the home. The Bible says, who can find a trustworthy man?

Proverbs 20, verse number six. Where are they? Where are they? If Solomon was alive today, what would he say? Is there anybody trustworthy? Is there a spouse that's dependable? That she can count on? That won't abandon his family, her family, but will remain true to the end. Next, our homes are corrupted by compromise. Our homes are being corrupted by compromise. So subtly, so easily, we compromise the moral standard, don't we? Sure we did. John would say in 1 John 521, little children, keep yourselves from idols.

Paul would say, 1 Corinthians 10, 1st 114, flee idolatry. And we think that idolatry is going and bowing down to some foreign object and worshipping that object as if that object is God. We would say, we would never do that. But idolatry goes way beyond that. Paul would say in Ephesians chapter 5, it's 3, verse number 5, no covetous man who is an idolater shall inherit the kingdom of God. If you covet your neighbor's wife, if you covet someone else's house, if you covet someone else's body, if you want something that you do not have, you are an idolater, the Bible says.

your affections are being swayed from the one true God, the God of the universe, to go after that which will satisfy your own lust. That's why Paul stood over in Philippian chapter 3, verse number 19, whose God is their belly, or whose God is their appetite, or literally whose God is their lusts. Idolatry is when we set our affections elsewhere to go after something and desire something, something so much that if we don't get it we are upset if we don't have it we are angered we will pursue it with a passion that's idolatry that's covetousness and we have compromised our stand on the moral virtues of scripture I'll beware of the compromising spirit beware of of wanting more.

Beware of craving education. Craving knowledge. Craving more things, wanting them, it'll get you to compromise. You'll stand. It'll get you to say, well, that's okay. We can do this. It's not that bad. And one thing leads to another. I'm always reminded of a lot. We looked to Sodom. That's where he wanted to be. So he leaned towards Sodom in order to live in Sodom. In order that he may one day lead in Sodom. Why? Because he loved Sodom. and lastly our homes are being ravaged by revenge they're being ravaged by revenge they're being ravaged by revenge proverbs 20 verse number 22 says it this way do not say i will repay evil wait for the lord and he will save you.

Our homes are being ravaged by revenge. Oh, just very subtle ways. We are going to get back at the one that offended us. Never again will she embarrass me in public. Never again will she do what she did in public again. I will see to it. And we look for ways to make sure squelch her or we squelch him oh he cheated on me once he'll never do it again oh I'm gonna make sure I keep him in line I will hold this over his head for as long as he lives happens all the time we have such vengeful spirits what did Christ say vengeance is mine I will pay, says the Lord.

That's my job. Why are you trying to be my job? You want to know why? Just go back to Genesis chapter 3. If you eat, you'll be like God. Do you know why you seek revenge? Because you want to be God. That's why. Vengeance is mine. I'm going to repay pay. That's That's my job. How dare you take my job upon yourself? Instead is this. You repay evil with good. That's what you do. You've been wronged. You've been ripped apart. This is what you do. You turn right around and you do good. You look for work.

ways to uplift. You look for ways to forgive. You look for ways to love. You look for ways to give your life away to the one who abuse you the worst. That's what Jesus did. He gave his life away to those who hated him in order that he might redeem them. Is your home being ravaged by revenge? I've said this. maybe 50 times. Let me say it one more time.

Whenever your rights are first, righteousness always suffers. Always. If it's about your rights, there is no righteousness. None. It's about God. It's not about you. I think of Philippian's Chapter 2 says this, if there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation of love, if there's any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united and spirit, intent on one purpose. Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind, let each of you regard one another as more important than himself.

Now that will revolutionize your home. Regard one another as more important than yourself. Wow. What instruction. Those are just some of the conditions of our homes. Is there hope? Oh yeah. There's lots of hope. From the one who designed the home, that's point number two.

And you know we're not going to finish it this evening. But I will introduce to you the first point is that you understand there is hope for your home.

There are five basic ingredients that God gives you for your home. and we will build off of those in the weeks and months ahead. But the first one is this, fear the Christ.

This is where it begins. Let me take something. Your home doesn't need a reformation. Your home needs a redemption. You don't need to be reformed. You need to be redeemed, right? It all begins with knowing for certain that you know Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. Fear God and worship Him, said the angel in Revelation 14-7. And if you fear the Christ, he will show you what you need to do. He will explain to you very clearly what needs to happen in your family. And you will begin to see things change for the glory of Almighty God.

but it begins with fearing the Christ. How does that happen? That's next week.