The Consequences of David's Sin, Part 1

What a great joy it is to be able to study your word and to understand the implications of it for our lives. Tonight Lord Jesus open up our eyes that we might be able to be able to behold the wonderful beauties of your law. That we might understand Lord Jesus the consequences of sin as you have recorded them in Scripture. That we might be the kind of people that long to follow our Savior. We pray in Jesus name. Amen. If you got your Bible 2nd Samuel chapter 13 is where we're at. 2nd Samuel chapter 13.

I want to let you know that this is This is a horrific chapter. It's horrific. But more than that It is a holy chapter. Because it's in the holy book, the Bible. It's inspired by God. So as horrific as it is when we read it, you must understand that there is a reason God puts it here. There's a reason why God gives us the consequences in detail of David's sin. And we will look at them this evening and next week and they will follow David to the end of his life.

And we'll see why as we continue looking at the life of David. 2nd Samuel chapter 13 begins this way. Now it was after this that Absalom the son of David had a beautiful sister whose name was Tamar. And Amnon the son of David loved her. And Amnon was so frustrated because of his sister Tamar that he made himself ill. For she was a virgin and it seemed hard to Amnon to do anything to her. But Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab the son of Shimeah David's brother. Jonadab was a very shrewd man.

And he said to him, oh son of the king, why are you so depressed morning after morning? Will you not tell me? Then Amnon said to him, I am in love with Tamar the sister of my brother Absalom. Jonadab then said to him, lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. When your father comes to see you say to him, please let my sister Tamar come and give me some food to eat. And let her prepare the food in my sight that I may see it and eat from her hand. So Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. When the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, please let my sister Tamar come and make me a couple of cakes in my sight that I may eat from her hand.

Then David sent to the house for Tamar saying, go now to your brother Amnon's house and prepare food for him. So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house and he was lying down and she took dough, kneaded it, made cakes in the sight and baked the cakes. And she took the pan and dished them out before him. But he refused to eat and Amnon said, have everyone go out from me. So everyone went out from him. Then Amnon said to Tamar, bring the food to the bedroom that I may eat from your hand. So Tamar took the cakes which she had made and brought them into the bedroom to her brother Amnon.

When she brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, come lie with me my sister. But she answered him, no my brother, do not violate me for such a thing is not done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing. As for me, where could I get rid of my reproach? And as for you, you will be like one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, please speak to the king for he will not withhold me from you. However, he would not listen to her. Since he was stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her.

Then Amnon hated her with a very great hatred. For the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, get up, go away. But she said to him, no, because this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you have done to me. Yet he would not listen to her. Then he called his young man who attended him and said, now throw this woman out of my presence and lock the door behind her. Now she had on a long-sleeved garment, for in this manner the virgin daughters of the king dressed themselves in robes.

Then his attendant took her out and locked the door behind her. And Tamar put ashes on her head and tore her long-sleeved garment, which was on her, and she put her hand on her head and went away crying aloud as she went. Then Absalom, her brother, said to her, Has Amnon, your brother, been with you? But now keep silent, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this matter to heart. So Tamar remained and was desolate in their brother Absalom's house. Now when King David heard of all these matters, he was very angry.

But Absalom did not speak to Amnon either good or bad. For Absalom hated Amnon because he had violated his sister Tamar. We'll stop right there because that's as far as we're going to get this evening. As I said, it was horrific. Turn me down just a little bit, please. Thank you. It's a horrific chapter, but it is the holy chapter. It is the consequences of David's sin. You could call it trouble and tragedy in the palace because that's exactly what is taking place here. When David began his ministry on the backside of Bethlehem tending sheep and God began to groom him and grow him for the kingship of Israel, David's life was blessed.

David's life was one that was bright and because it was blessed by God, it was a beautiful life. But everything changed after chapter 11 of 2nd Samuel with his relationship with Bathsheba. That which was bright and that which was blessed that made the life of David beautiful now became dark, now became depressed, now became destructive. Thus his life was devastated. All that changed not in an instant, but he progressed that direction. If you've been with us in our study of 2nd Samuel, you know that everything began long ago with David with his carelessness, in his obedience, in his reverence, in his vigilance.

He was very careless when it came to doing all that the law of God said and that's where it began. What happened in 2nd Samuel 11 is the fruit of his carelessness. That led to his idleness, that led to his lustfulness, that led to his nakedness, that led to his fearlessness, that led to his shamelessness. And you know the the route in which we took you many weeks ago as we understood the spiral, the downward spiral of David's life, that led him ultimately to deceitfulness, that led him ultimately to his horrible sinfulness, that fortunately led him to his brokenness, because Nathan would confront him on a sin.

And yet the consequences for David remain. They remain for the rest of his life. And so the natural question is, wait a minute, doesn't God forgive sins? Well, the answer is yes. He does forgive sins. And some would say, well doesn't when God forgives our sins because we confess them, doesn't he throw them in the depths of the sea as the book of Micah tells us, separates them as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more? Yes, he does. But the consequences will always remain. We have this notion in 21st century Christianity that forgiveness obliterates consequences.

It doesn't. And David is a perfect example of a man who was forgiven, but had to live with the consequences of a sin. God said in 1 Samuel 12 verse number 13, when David said to Nathan, I have sinned against the Lord. And Nathan said to David, the Lord also has taken away your sin. You shall not die. You're gonna live. The consequences of your sin, David, is death. But guess what? God's forgiven you your sins. You're not going to die. And then he says, however, because the deed you have given, because of this deed you have given occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme the child also that is born to you shall surely die.

He had said earlier these words, verse 10 of 2 Samuel 12, the sword shall never depart from your house, because you have despised me and have taken the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your wife. Thus says the Lord, behold, I will raise up evil against you from your own household. I will even take your wives before your eyes and give them to your companion and he shall lie with your wives in broad daylight. Indeed, you did it secretly, but I will do this thing before all Israel and under the sun. God made it very clear that David there are consequences for what you did in secret that all the world will see.

And David had to live with those consequences. Even though he had been forgiven of a sin. Alan Redpath has written a book on David's life. It's not a very big book. It's a small book. But in there he says these words. He says, each of us is under the judgment of sin, which God has never forgiven, or we suffer from the chastisement of our Heavenly Father because of sin which he has forgiven. That's really good. See, there's a difference between being under the judgment of God because our sins are not forgiven and being under the chastisement of a Heavenly Father because our sins are forgiven.

That's why the writer of Hebrews said it this way. Hebrews 12 verse number 5 Have you forgotten the exhortation which is addressed to you as sons? My son do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord nor faint when you are reproved by him. For those whom the Lord loves he disciplines, and he scourges every son whom he receives. It is for discipline that you endure. God deals with you as with sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.

Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them. Shall we not much rather be subject to the father of spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good that we may share his holiness. All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful. Yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. The writer of Hebrews knows that if God loves you, he will chasten you.

He, as the text says, will scourge you. And God did not take lightly David's sin. It would have been very easy for the Lord God to slay David. To kill David. Because the consequences of his sin was death, according to the law of Moses. But God wanted to do something different. He wanted David to live and be able to understand God's chastening hand upon his life. And through all the suffering and sorrow that he would encounter, it would lead him to a solemn ending. Where he would learn to walk with God.

Where God would say that David was and is a man after my heart. God had different plans for David. The Bible is true. Be not deceived, God is not mocked. For whatsoever a man sows, that shall he also reap. Unfortunately, the pain of reaping always eclipses the pleasure of sowing. It always does. In Revelation chapter 3, verse number 19, the Lord God said, to those I love, I reprove, I rebuke, I discipline. If I love you, I will do that. And that's exactly what happens in the life of King David. Alan Redpath would go on to say these words, I think are very insightful.

He says, that which happened in David's home during these years was not in spite of the fact that God had forgiven him, but because God had forgiven him. The man whom God forgives sometimes has to drink very deeply of the well, which his sin has tapped. In this easy day, when we want cheap forgiveness, this may shock you. But as a preacher, I have a responsibility in the name of the Lord to substantiate these things from Scripture and to show you how the chasing hand of a loving Heavenly Father is very different from the judging hand of a holy God.

And what you have in the life of David is not the judging hand of a holy God, but the loving hand of a father who cares for his own, to discipline them in a way which is best for the kingdom of God. David had caused the enemies of God to blaspheme God. And so God did not take that lightly. That had to be dealt with. And the best way for God to deal with it, so the enemies would not blaspheme his name, was to allow David to endure the sorrow and suffering for the rest of his earthly days. So that all those enemies would see the consequences of sin.

And boy, are they hard on David. But in all reality, David has no one to blame but himself. And you will see in this chapter that that David as the king, as David as father, does not do what he should do. He neglects his responsibility, not only as king, but as father. And it's a reminder to all of us as fathers, that if we know, to him that knoweth to do good and doeth it not, to him it is sin. As fathers, as leaders, we have huge responsibility to deal with sin. If we don't, the consequences only get worse.

They don't get better. And maybe here tonight, as a father, and those consequences are worse now than ever, because you didn't deal quickly and swiftly with sin when it arose in your home. This is important. David didn't do that. And the consequences just became increasingly worse. God promised the sword will not depart from your house. And he paid fourfold that way. The baby died. That happened in chapter 12. Now we move to chapter 13. In Amnon, his firstborn, is going to die. Because Absalom, the third son, is going to kill him.

It will take him two years before he actually does it. Two years. But he plots it perfectly, to make sure that Amnon dies for what he did to Absalom's full-blooded sister. Tamar was Amnon's half-sister, but she was Absalom's full-blooded sister. After that, Joab will kill Absalom. Absalom will die. And then Adonijah, he will die, because he'll try to usurp the throne from Solomon. So death upon death upon death upon death builds in the life of David. Simply because there was a time in his life when he was careless in his obedience to God.

And that developed a callousness, slowly but surely, that allowed him to move down the spiral of absolute debauchery. It caused the consequences to be absolutely horrendous. Folks, the Bible gives us this account, so we would understand it. It's crucial that we come to grips with it. Over in the book of Jeremiah. Jeremiah chapter 2. These words are recorded, which help us understand what's happening to David. Jeremiah chapter 2 verse number 19, your own wickedness will correct you, and your apostasies will reprove you.

Know therefore and see that it is evil and bitter for you to forsake the Lord your God, and the dread of me is not in you, declares the Lord of hosts. God says it is a bitter and evil thing.

For you not to fear my name. It will be absolutely horrific for you, if you don't dread me. If you do your own thing, and forsake the name of the Lord your God, it will be so incredibly hard on you. See, we don't think that. Because we hear messages like, you know, God's a God of grace, and he'll forgive you. It'll be okay. See, that was Amnon's thinking with his half-sister Tamar. More about that in a second.

But we hear these messages today in the church, not about you should live in the dread of God. You should live in the fear of God. We don't hear those messages anymore. And unfortunately, people take God lightly. They live a very flippant Christian life. Assuming that everything will turn out okay, that God's grace covers everything. I'll be forgiven and everything will be okay. Listen, you will be forgiven. But forgiveness never negates consequences. And you might not face those consequences today.

You might not face them tomorrow, but you will face the consequences inevitably because of the sins you commit when you forsake the Lord your God, and you do not fear him. That's what happened with David. He lives out Jeremiah chapter 2, verse number 19. David knew that sorrow was coming because Nathan told him. You see, we don't have that luxury. When you sin, you come to me. I can't tell you the future. I can't tell you how it's gonna play out. I can't tell you, well, this is what God's gonna do.

The sword's never gonna depart from your house. You're gonna pay fourfold for what you've done. I can't tell you that because I don't know that. So you don't know the consequences. That's probably a good thing. David knew them. David had to wait in anticipation of how those consequences would come about in his life. Because Nathan said this is how it's gonna happen. This is what's gonna go on. He didn't give him every exact detail. He just said that what's gonna happen is that your enemies, your companions, will lie with your wives and all the world will see it.

The sword, David, will never depart from your house. It's always gonna remain. So how does all that work out? Well, the baby dies. That's one, right? He understands that. Then he moved to 2 Samuel chapter 13. And you have this record of a rape in Scripture because that's what it is. Then you have the reaction by Amnon, Absalom, Tamar, and David to that rape. And then you have the revenge. We haven't gotten to that yet. That'll be next week. The revenge for that rape. As Absalom takes it upon his own self to devise a plan to kill his brother, his half-brother, for violating his sister.

Tragedy and trouble in the palace, in the home. It's a reminder to all of us as fathers. You have a huge responsibility. Huge, bigger than you can ever imagine. It is so big, it is so mammoth that you must live a righteous, holy life. And when you sin, you got to seek forgiveness. Forgiveness immediately from those you've sinned against. Because you want to make sure that you provide for your children, for your wife, for your grandchildren, an example of humility and purity. So important. So, the record of the rape.

Absalom, Tamar. Absalom's name means father of peace. Ironic, is it not? The father of peace would seek revenge upon his half-brother, then seek his father's kingdom. But that's down the road. You understand why he does that? He's called the father of peace. Tamar just means palm tree. But they were both beautiful. If you read chapter 13, verse number 1, chapter 14, verse number 25, you read that Absalom also was a handsome young man. So David, we already know was a handsome man and now he's produced this young girl Tamar who was probably a teenager, up in her years maybe, a late teen age, and then you have Absalom.

But the text opens by telling us about this incident with Amnon. How sick he is because he would, he longs with this this love for Tamar. Now you got to realize that in those days, if you were a virgin, you wore certain robes. In this case, we understand that that Tamar had a long-sleeve robe on. It was a specific color to distinguish her from all the other women. So they would know that they were virgins. That's important. You also need to know that virgins were secluded in the palace. They were not allowed to be and hang around other men.

Okay, now in the family, there would be family occasions where the families would get together. Brothers, sisters. So Amnon knew of the beauty of Tamar. But she would live in seclusion for her protection, of course, because women were easily violated in those days. And so she would live there in seclusion for the purpose of protection. And Amnon would pine away to be with Tamar. So much so, he became ill. He was so lovesick. He literally became ill, longing for Tamar. So what'd he do? He tells his cousin Jonadab about his love for Tamar.

And Jonadab, the text says, is a shrewd man. And he was a shrewd man. You got to be careful about people that counsel you to sin. You always got to be careful with people who who make it easy for you to sin or to continue in sin. Why? Because those people can't be trusted and they will turn on you. And sure enough, the cousin, Jonadab, of Amnon deceives him and does not tell him about Absalom's plot to kill Amnon. Because that's the way shrewd, conniving people are. But Amnon tells him about his love for Tamar.

So Jonadab gives him a plan. Just pretend you're sick. Just pretend you're sick. Your dad'll come in, tell your dad you're sick, you know, and then ask for Amnon, or for Tamar, to come and cook for you and feed you. And then you'll have her all to yourself. That's what he does. That's the plan. And so sure enough, he's sick. His dad realizes he's sick. And that's that's David's first problem.

Remember, David had lost, and you will see this as time goes on, his ability to discern. Because whenever you, immorality does something to you that no other sin does to you. We forget that. 1st Corinthians 6 says that every sin you commit affects the outside of your body, except one. That's sexual sin. It affects the inside of your body. It affects everything on the inside. Your emotions, your intellect, your will, everything on the inside, sexual sin affects. And so, therefore, David, because of a sin, although forgiven, although restored, his senses has been dulled to discern between what is right and wrong.

We'll see this in a moment. Why Absalom knew that Tamar had been with Amnon. How did he know that? And yet David, the father of Tamar, would allow her to go to Amnon. David should have known. David should have known what Absalom knew, that Amnon was a man of wicked nature and a wicked character. And David should have been the protector of his daughter, but he wasn't. Because fathers are known by their ability to protect their families, to provide for their families, to be the priests and prophets in their families.

That's what fathers are. That's what they do. And David failed to protect his daughter. Absalom knew. As soon as he saw Tamar, she'd been violated by Amnon. How did he know that? Because he knew the character of Amnon. Tell me, David didn't know that? Sure he knew. But he allowed Tamar to go into him. So he has this plan. She comes in. He sends everybody out. Everybody leave me. I want Tamar here by herself. And Tamar was a great woman. She was beautiful. Okay, very attractive. Okay, she could cook.

Okay, everybody wants an attractive woman who can cook too. Okay, she could do that. And she was wise. Very wise. Based on her conversation to her half-brother Amnon. Her counsel to him was very wise. And so she was the whole package. She was beautiful on the outside. She was beautiful on the inside because she was a virgin. She was able to to provide because she could cook. Evidently she could cook very well. And she was intelligent. Very wise. When it came to the law of God. Who wouldn't want a woman like that to marry?

And Amnon is just head over heels for his half-sister. Okay, now he can't have his half-sister. It violates Leviticus 18. It violates Leviticus 20. And it violates the law of the book of Deuteronomy. So he can't have his half-sister. So why would he go down that route? Why would he even go there? He would go there simply because way back before the law was given there was a man named father Abraham who married who? His half-sister. So in his own mind he can rationalize what he's doing. Even though the law, listen carefully, even though the law of God said you can't do that.

It's okay because my dad did it. My dad compromised scripture. The Bible says you can't take many wives, but dad did.

Dad did it. Let me tell you something, dad. Whenever you do it, your kids are gonna do it and they're gonna multiply it. So be careful when you sin. Be careful because your kids are gonna do it. Because their excuse is, well, dad did it. Mom did it. If they did it, why can't I do it? Now that doesn't make it right. But that's what they do. That's their excuse. Some of you are nodding your head. You already know that. That's exactly what they do. And so Amnon in his own mind is thinking, well, you know what?

Dad violated scripture. Hey, listen, let me say something else. When David married Makkah, who is the mother of Absalom and Tamar, he also violated Deuteronomy chapter 7. He took a Gentile woman to be his wife. So again, he violated scripture. So Amnon is thinking in his own mind, it's okay to violate scripture a little bit because my dad did. It's okay. I can do this thing. And so he calls her in. She bakes him or cooks him, whatever it is they did back in those days. However long it took, I don't know.

But she made everything and he grabbed her by the hand. He goes, I want you to lie with me. What did she say? No! First thing she said.

It wasn't, let me pray about it for a second. It was no. First thing he said was no. That's what she said. If you look at the text, it says very clearly these words.

But she answered it in verse 12. No, my brother. No, do not violate me. Don't do something that would be wrong. For such a thing is not done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing. No, do not. Do not. Every father wants a daughter like that. See, she was mm. It's not gonna happen. I'm not lying with you, Annon. It's not gonna happen. Not today. So what did Annon do? This is what else she says. As for me, where could I get rid of my reproach? Are you kidding me? I will be a disgrace. And as for you, you will be like one of the fools in Israel.

Now therefore, please speak to the king for he will not withhold me from you. Now, what was she saying there? Go to the king. Go to the king. Ask the king if I can be your wife. Surely he won't withhold you from me. Now, is that what she's saying? You know what she's saying? She's saying hold on a second.

Go to your dad and ask him. He goes and ask her. She's out there. She's gone. You know, she's gonna be gone. You go to your dad and ask him. That's what she's saying. Because the law said that you can't marry your half-sister. Can't do it. And she knows that. She does everything right. So however, he would not listen to her since he was stronger than she. He violated her and lay with her. Wow. He just took her, manhandled her and raped her. Right there. He wasn't going to listen to wise counsel. He was going to heed what the word of the Lord said.

He just did what he wanted to do. And thus he raped her. Listen carefully. Wow, time flies. He mirrored David's sin. Tamar was very attractive. 2nd Samuel 11 says that Bathsheba was very beautiful to look upon. So both, like father, like son, they had trouble with their eyes. And the Bible says, as Job did, I've made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully upon a woman.

That's what the Bible says. Guard your heart for out of the flow all the issues of life. You got to guard your heart. You got to protect your heart. Why? Because it's not the lustful looking that causes a man to commit adultery in his heart. It's the adulterous heart that caused the man to look lustfully upon a woman. That's what Christ did in Matthew chapter 5. It's what's happening on the inside. And so what was happening on the inside in Annon's life was that he wanted this woman and she was attractive.

David saw Bathsheba as attractive. And so what did they do? They both committed immorality. One by consent, one by force. And both rebelled against wise counsel. They did. Wise counsel by Tamar because she said this is wrong. How can we violate the law of Israel? How can we do this thing? It's wrong. You'll become a fool in all of Israel. Don't do this thing, Annon. It's wrong. David was counseled by the men of his palace. That's Uriah's wife. You can't go take her. She's married. But neither one of them heeded wise counsel.

And thus Annon mirrored his father when it came to sexual sin. That's horrendous. And so you've moved to point number two.

That's the reaction to the rape. The reaction to the rape. What is Annon's reaction? Now he hates her worse than the love he had for her at the beginning. Now he's done with her. Get out of here. She says no. No, I can't leave. I just can't leave because if I leave, if I get out of here, it's gonna be worse for me than what just took place for me. He says get out of here. He calls his attendant. Get her out of here and bolt the door behind you. I want nothing to do with this woman. And what he was doing was signifying that she would come in to him and come on to him.

He was trying to cover his tracks and protect his own life. And she knew that that's what would be portrayed. She would be portrayed as coming on to him. She would be portrayed as the aggressor and she didn't want that to happen. He says get out of here now.

Get her out of here. Got her out of there, bolted the door. What did she do? Go from the reaction of Annon to the reaction of Tamar. What does she do? She puts ashes on her head. She tears her robe. She rips her robe. Why? She's no longer a virgin. She can't wear that robe anymore. She's been disgraced. She puts her head in her hands and begins to weep sorrowfully. She has lost her virginity. She's lost everything she has held dear and now she's been violated by her half-brother in the palace of the king.

No less. Then the other reaction of Absalom as soon as he sees her. What's the text say? Then Absalom her brother said to her has Amnon your brother been with you? In other words has he done something to you? He knew. He knew it was Amnon. It wasn't what happened? Who did this? It was has Absalom done this to you? Now keep silent my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this matter to heart. In other words don't worry I'll deal with it. And I'll deal with it my own time. And this began in Absalom's mind the way he would kill his brother.

Now remember Amnon is first son. First son heir to the throne, right? Absalom third son. Second son is already dead.

So third son is Absalom. So even in his own mind he's thinking okay, now I've got a way to ascend the throne. I can kill my brother, my half-brother. That makes me next in line. That makes me the natural heir to the throne. And that's his thinking. And so he says to his sister Tamar, don't worry you stay here with me. I'll protect you. You stay with me here with me. I will hide you. You stay here with me and don't take this matter to heart. I'll deal with it. And I'll deal with it my own time and sure enough he does.

He does. And then it says verse 21. Now when David heard all these that all these matters he was very angry. That's it. Are you kidding me? You're angry? That's all we get out of David. That's all we get out of the king. Isn't the king to enact justice? Righteousness in the palace, in the kingdom? Isn't he king over all of Israel? He is. Wouldn't that Tamar believe in her own heart? Father won't you protect me? Father won't you defend me? Father won't you stand by me? Father won't you do what is necessary to preserve me as your daughter?

Dad will you do something? But he did nothing. He did nothing. I read that that blows my mind. I don't get that. I'm getting a gun. I'm getting two guns. I'm doing something. He did nothing. Nothing. Because he had lost credibility. His family. Now because he lost credibility doesn't mean that he shouldn't do something. Because he should. You must do something when sin operates. He did nothing. He just became angry. Well, what good is that? What did he do? Rant and rave in his own his own bedroom?

Did Tamar know anything about it? Did Absalom know anything about it? You see Absalom was gonna wait to see what dad does. Dad does nothing and one of the reasons Absalom takes things into his own hand is because his father does absolutely nothing. So Absalom says I'll do something. My dad doesn't. I will. And David did nothing. That to me that to me is worse than a sin with Bathsheba. Because he did nothing it escalates the sin in his family. It causes it to blow way out of proportion. He did nothing.

He should have been responsible. He should have been faithful to the Word of God. He knows what the law of God says, but because he has already compromised the law on several occasions compromising the law again is not that big a deal if we can just keep everything in the in-house in the palace.

So no one else finds out about it. Keep it within the family. Let's don't embarrass the family. Let me tell you something David.

You've already embarrassed the family. It's already happened. But let's don't embarrass the family. Let's let's keep everything in-house. I want to hear something that's just as bad. Listen to what the Bible says about David with Adonijah his fourth son.

And his father had never crossed him at any time by asking him. Why have you done so? 1st Kings chapter 1 verse number 6. Never once did he go to Adonijah as the king and say hey, what are you doing? You can't do that. You're wrong. Not once. So Adonijah thinks he can usurp the throne. He can take over Solomon. He can become the next king and he dies. Fathers, parents, listen and listen well. You better do something. You better do something. If your child sins deal with it. Your child violates the law of God deal with it quickly, swiftly, decisively, gracefully, but deal with it.

Too many parents today just say, it's alright. Kids are kids. Let them be kids. No, no, no, no. Those kids grow up to be adults. Instead of doing kid sins, they do adult sins. So deal with it. We got too many parents who don't deal with things when they arise in their family. You need to deal with them. You've got to become a responsible parent. David became irresponsible. He had lost credibility. Yes, but it doesn't negate the fact that he has to stand strong still on truth. While he might not be as as credible as he he could have been, he still needs to say, you know what son, that is a violation of scripture.

That is the result in death. And maybe David was thinking, you know, I got grace. I didn't die. I'm going to extend grace to my son so he doesn't die. But that wasn't his call. You see, God extended grace to David through Nathan because God had made a covenant with David. And God said to Nathan, you will not die. God didn't say to David, tell Annon he's not gonna die. Well, first of all, Annon didn't repent.

So the consequences automatically should have been death for him. But he didn't do that. You know why? Because he wanted to preserve the relationship over truth. That will kill a parent every time. Folks, that'll kill you every time. It did to Eli. Remember Eli? Go back to first Samuel chapter 2.

First Samuel chapter 2 verse 17 says, thus the sin of the young men Hophni and Phinehas. And let me stop you right there.

If you name your kids a dumb name, expect problems. Hophni and Phinehas. Are you kidding me? Hophni and Phinehas. You're just asking for sinful issues to arise in your home. Thus the sin of the young men was very great before the Lord for the men despised the offering of the Lord. Verse 22. Now Eli was very old and he heard all that his sons were doing to all Israel and how they lay with the women who served at the doorway of the tent of meeting. He said to them, why do you do such things? The evil things that I hear from all these people.

No, my sons for the report is not good which I hear the Lord's people circulating. If one sins against another, God will mediate for him. But if a man sins against the Lord, who can intercede for him? Oh guys, come on. You shouldn't do that. You know better than that. Come on, fellas. Step it up a little bit here. You know what God says about that.

Come on. That's Eli's response. But they would not listen to the voice of their father for the Lord desired to put them to death. Let me tell you something.

When you talk like that to your children, they don't listen to you. Come on, son. That's not how you do it. That's not what you're supposed to do. They're like, what do you know? You don't know anything. That's all you're gonna say? And they're gonna go and do it anyway. As parents, you are not the friend of your child. You're their father. You're their mother. You're their disciplinarian. If you want to be their friend, you'll lose their friendship. Guaranteed. If you want to be your child's friend, you've lost them.

But if you're the father, the mother, the disciplinarian, when they're older, guess what? They're gonna be your friend. Because you taught them the truth and lived the truth. Eli was very old. Come on, guys. You know better than that? Then a man of God came to Eli. That's always a problem when a man of God comes to you. Thus says the Lord, did I not indeed reveal myself to the house of your father when they were in Egypt and bonded to Pharaoh's house? And did I not choose them from all the tribes of Israel to be my priests, to go up to my altar, to burn incense, to carry an ephod before me?

And did I not give to the house of your father all the fire offerings of the sons of Israel? He rehearses the history of Israel. Now, you got to get the next verse. If you miss the next verse, you're in trouble. Get the next verse. Why do you, plural, why do you, Hophni, Phinehas, and Eli, why do you kick at my sacrifice and at my offering which I have commanded in my dwelling? Wait a minute. Eli didn't do that. Oh, oh, oh, yes, he did. Because if you don't confront the sin, you participate in the sin.

Did you know that? If you don't confront the sin and deal with the sin, it's as if you condone the sin, therefore you are participating in the sin. That's why it says in 1 Thessalonians 5, 22, about elders in the church, and not laying your hands too hastily on an elder unless you participate in his sins. What sins? The sins he commits as an elder because you put him in the office too early and you now are a participant in his sinning. Wow. And God says, you, Eli, along with Hophni and Phinehas, have kicked against my sacrifice.

Here it is, and honor your sons above me. That's the problem in today's families. You want a relationship. You don't want truth. You'll elevate the relationship over the truth, and that's the problem in America. That's the problem in the church. That's a problem in any family. You got problems in your family? That's the problem. You want the relationship preserved. You'll do anything to preserve the relationship, and if it's not based on truth, you have no relationship. You don't have one. No matter what you think you might have, you don't have a relationship.

It's all based on superficial things, because it's not based on truth. And God says, you wanted them above me?

You were more concerned about your relationship with them than you were concerned about your relationship with me. And if you're concerned about your relationship with me, you're concerned about the truth, and if you're concerned about truth, you're going to confront everything that's against truth. And then he says this, by making yourselves fat with the choices of every offering of my people Israel. Yes, that's you, Eli. Therefore, the Lord God of Israel declares, I did indeed say that your house and the house of your father should walk before me forever.

But now the Lord declares, far be it from me, for those who honor me I will honor, and those who despise me will be lightly esteemed. Eli, you didn't honor me, simply because you wanted a relationship with your boys. Do you really want a relationship with your kids so badly that you'll dishonor God? Are you kidding me? Is that where we are in today's world? Is that where we are? That we want a relationship with our family members so much that we'll forsake the truth of God and a relationship with God.

We will honor our children above honoring God. Are you kidding me? Is that where we are now? How despicable can that possibly be? And God says, they're gonna die, and they all die.

They all die. God says, it's all about me. David honored Amnon above God, and he despised the truth of God. Because he did not obey God's Word. Folks, this is a horrible chapter. But I can't think of anything more holy than that. Because God warns us. He says, look, you can't do this. Because the results are just gonna be worse than you can ever imagine. You don't want that. I don't want that. And God certainly doesn't want that. Let me pray with you.

Father, thank you, Lord, for tonight. I pray, God, that we would be strong in the Word and the power of His might. Lord, you are a great God, and you alone are worthy to be praised. Father, we need to be the men of our homes. The fathers that stand on truth, that do not compromise for any reason. That live in the light of your coming again, to lead our families, help the men who are here tonight to be strong, not back down from the truth. Even though it might cost them a relationship with their children, may they realize that it won't cost them a relationship with their God.

Because they want to honor you above anything else. God says, you've said it, you honor me. I'm gonna honor you, but you got to put me first, above all else.

Help us to learn from the life of King David, that we might understand. God, you are a great God of forgiveness, and you do forgive us. And yet those consequences will remain. May we, this night, rise up and think before we act, that the consequences could be eternally devastating. We pray in Jesus' name, amen.