A Practical Charge to Parents and Children, Part 2

Most of you have no idea who Callie Ann Ray Hope Montez was. She lived seven weeks. She was born on March 28th of this year. She died on May 13th of this year. And I was asked if I would do the memorial service this past week. And so I felt honored to be asked and felt privileged to be able to share with the family the assurance that their little one is in glory with the Lord today. I don't doubt that. That the Bible talks about children of pagans in Jeremiah twice calling them innocent ones. Also the Bible speaks to the fact that in Mark chapter 10 verse number 16 that Jesus took into his arms little children and he blessed them.

There is nowhere in the scriptures where Jesus ever blesses the unbeliever, the cursed or the damned. So he brings little children into his arms and he blesses them in Mark 10 verse number 16. But one of the key verses to understanding your child who dies in infancy or dies in the womb or dies before the age or the condition of accountability. Don't like to use the word age of accountability because the condition of accountability speaks to the issues a lot clearer. Because there are some who are 20 and 30 and 40 but because of a mental deficiency they are not at the condition of accountability.

But yet God still takes them into glory. We read about that in the book of Jonah the fourth chapter. And so I took them to 2 Samuel chapter 12. So if you have your Bible turn there with me if you would please this morning to begin our time. You know about David's sin with Bathsheba and how she conceived a child. And this child, listen carefully, would have been the seventh son of David. David was king of Judah or king in Hebron over Judah for seven years. During those seven years he had six sons, six sons.

When he became king over all of Israel the kingdom moved to Jerusalem. And there was his affair with Bathsheba. And the seventh son would have been the child born to Bathsheba, the first child born to Bathsheba.

Solomon of course would be the eighth son born to David through Bathsheba. And so Nathan the prophet told David that his son was going to die. The Bible tells us in 2 Samuel chapter 12 verse number 18. Then it happened on the seventh day that the child died. And the servants of David were afraid to tell him that the child was dead. For they said, Behold, while the child was still alive we spoke to him and he did not listen to our voice. How then can we tell him that the child is dead since he might do himself harm?

But when David saw that his servants were whispering together, David perceived that the child was dead. So David said to his servants, Is the child dead? And they said, He is dead. So David arose from the ground, washed, anointed himself, changed his clothes, and he came to the house of the Lord and worshiped. Then he came to his own house, and when he requested they set food before him and he ate. Then the servants said to him, What is this thing that you have done? While the child was alive you fasted and wept, but when the child died you arose and ate food.

He said, While the child was still alive I fasted and wept, for I said, Who knows, the Lord may be gracious to me that the child may live, but now he has died, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me. You have something very unique happen in David's life. He fasted, he prayed for those seven days, he wept. Maybe the Lord would be gracious to him and allow the son to live. The child lived seven days, and the Lord took him home. When David heard of that, he arose, he washed himself, changed his clothes, worshipped, and ate.

And the servants were perplexed. Why is it now you are doing this? Because David had the absolute assurance that his newborn son was in glory and that he would go to see him once again. He knew that. Now, having said that, I want to contrast the death of that child with the death of David's third son, Absalom.

Amnon was the first son. Amnon was killed by Absalom because Amnon violated his half-sister Tamar and Absalom was angry at his father because he did nothing to Amnon. So Absalom murdered the firstborn of David. And then he rebelled against David and wanted to take over the kingdom. So there was a battle, there was a war. And David says to his men, Go easy on my son Absalom. But Absalom was killed in battle. Now, turn with me to 2 Samuel 18.

2 Samuel 18, it says in verse number 33, The king, David, was deeply moved and went up to the chamber over the gate and wept. This is about hearing of the death of Absalom. And thus he said as he walked, O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom, would I had died instead of you? O Absalom, my son, my son. Then it was told Joab, Behold, the king is weeping and mourns for Absalom. The victory that day was turned to mourning for all the people, for their people heard it said that day that the king is grieved for his son.

So the people went by stealth into the city that day as people who are humiliated steal away when they flee in battle. The king covered his face and cried out with a loud voice, O my son Absalom, O Absalom, my son, my son. Notice the difference in David's response to the death of Absalom versus the death of his infant son.

When he finds out that his infant son is dead, he no longer weeps. Instead he worships, he washes himself, he cleanses himself and gets back to doing kingly duties. But when he hears that Absalom is dead, his third born son, he weeps and cries and weeps.

So much so that Joab is concerned that the nation is going to turn against David because they feared that they wished that they were dead instead of his son Absalom. What's the difference? What is the difference between David's attitude with the two sons dying? One, one is that he stopped mourning when he knew his son was in heaven. The second one is he started mourning because he knew his third son was in hell.

That's why he mourned. That's why he wept. That's why he cried. Would it be that I had died? Why? Because David knows where he's going to go when he dies. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. David knows that. Would it be that I had died instead of my son Absalom? Because Absalom was a rebellious, wicked son who turned against the Lord, who turned against his father and no longer does he have a chance to repent and embrace Christ as Lord.

That's why he wept. Why did I say that to you? While your children are young, you have a great responsibility to teach them. Solomon would be son number eight. Listen to what Solomon says in the book of Proverbs chapter four. Hear O sons the instruction of a father and give attention that you may gain understanding for I give you sound teaching. Do not abandon my instruction. When I was a son to my father, tender and the only son in the sight of my mother, then he taught me and said to me, let your heart hold fast my words, keep my commandments and live.

This was Solomon's testimony. Remember, Absalom son number three, Amnon son number one, Solomon son number eight.

But Solomon says when I was young and I was at a tender age, my father would take me and teach me and say, listen, son, to my instruction. Hear the words that I have to say. Do we assume that David did not do that with Amnon and Absalom and Adonijah and the rest of his boys? He had 20 sons altogether, 20. Or do we assume that David did the same thing with Absalom that he did with Solomon? But with Solomon it took. With Solomon he heard the words of his father's instruction. He believed what his father said.

He understood. That's why he gives a testimony in chapter four as he speaks to his son, right? Remember the book of Proverbs, only book of the Bible written to young people. And so he's writing to his son saying, listen, I've given you my teaching. I've admonished you. I've given you my instruction. Listen while you're young. Acquire wisdom. Acquire understanding. Do not forget nor turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not forsake her for she will guard you. Love her. She will watch over you. The beginning of wisdom is acquire wisdom.

And with all your acquiring, get understanding. Prize her and she will exalt you. She will honor you if you embrace her. She will place on your head a garland of grace. She will present you with a crown of beauty. Hear my son and accept my sayings and the years of your life will be many. Now listen carefully to what I'm going to say. That is an axiom. That is a truism. The years of your life will be many. It's like Proverbs 22 verse number six. Train up a child in the way he should go. And when he was old, he will not depart from it.

Again, it's an axiom. It's a truism. In other words, it's that which normally is the case. But it doesn't mean that every godly parent who raises their kids in the nurtured emulation of the Lord is going to live a long life. They might die at a very early age. Because we don't know when God has appointed someone to die. And just because you train your children doesn't guarantee the fact that they're going to walk in the ways of God when they get older. But the normal pattern of life is this, that when you instruct them and teach them and show them the way of eternal life and instruct them in the words of God, when they are old, they will not depart from it.

Train them in the ways of the Lord. And of course, in the way of the Lord is the way contrary to the way of wickedness and foolishness in the book of Proverbs. And so, God is saying through Solomon to his son, you need to understand, if you want to have a productive life, if you want to have a long life, acquire wisdom. Get understanding. Embrace knowledge. Hear my instruction. Hear my words. Know my words. And Solomon is pleading with his son because you see, he knows in his mind that David his father would do the same thing for Absalom and Absalom didn't listen.

Absalom didn't follow. Absalom didn't want to follow. So he's pleading with his son, knowing, listen, I've lived this in my family. I know what this is like in my family. So son, listen to the words of your father and the instruction that he gives you so you don't make the same mistake that my brother made. Very important. Pretty powerful. He goes on to say, so much I have directed you in the way of wisdom. I have led you in the right paths. When you walk, your steps will not be impeded. And if you run, you will not stumble.

Take hold of instruction. Do not let go. Guard her for she is your life. Do not enter the path of the wicked and do not proceed in the way of evil men. Avoid it. Do not pass by it. Turn away from it and pass on. And the verse goes on. The chapter goes on and on and on. Chapter four is a mandate for every father in the room. Absolute necessity that you understand the instruction of a father to a son. Fathers, we have a huge responsibility. So God's called us to do, to instruct our children in the ways of the Lord.

But you see, if you don't believe that this word is the authoritative, inerrant, infallible word of the living God, you're not gonna do that. I was reading a few weeks ago on Wednesday night a book by George Barna entitled Raising Spiritual Champions. And in it, he gives these statistics. He says of the people that they took a survey from were people that were actively involved in the church, who claimed to believe that Jesus Christ was their Lord and King. They claimed to be Christians and they were actively involved in the church and attended regularly.

And the survey was taken of those who had children under the age of 13. And the effects were astonishing. Less than half of those people believed that the Bible is the only true and reliable word of God. 50%. And then it says, one third, 33% contend that God is the basis of all moral truth as revealed in the Bible.

Only 33%. And then only 25% believe that the absolute moral truth exists and that it's the same for everyone at every age at any time. So one out of four parents who claim to be Christians who actively participate in the life of the church, who serve in the church, only 25% of them believe in the undiluted truth of the living God. Listen, there's no hope for the other 75%. Why? Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain to build it. God has to build the house. So Psalm 127 says, unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain to build it.

We have parents, well-meaning parents who love the Lord, who are doing everything they can to make sure they're going overboard, working extra hours, making extra money to make sure that their kids get into the best college possible because they're more concerned about their child's education than their child's maturation. But they will work overboard. They will do all they can to make sure their child gets the best education in the country. But are they going overboard to make sure their children are growing spiritually and doing everything they possibly can to make sure that they love the Lord their God with all their heart, all their soul, all their mind, all their strength?

We're more concerned about our attendance at school on Monday than we are our attendance at church on Sunday. Why is that? It's because we're more concerned about what our culture brings us than what Christ will do for us. Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain to build it. How does the Lord build the house? He tells you. By wisdom, a house is built. By understanding, it is established. And by knowledge, the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches. Proverbs 24 verses 3 and 4.

So acquire wisdom. Wisdom is the application of truth to life. Understanding is the clarification of truth in life. Knowledge is the instruction of truth about life. To make sure that people understand this. In fact, he goes on to say these words. A wise man is strong and a man of knowledge increases power. But he says this. If you are slack in the day of distress, it's because your strength is limited. If you're slack in the day of distress, that's because you don't understand and know God. Because the knowledge of God helps you understand how to be strong in the Lord so you don't become slack in the day of distress.

You become stronger. You become resilient. You become immovable object because you rest in the rock of your salvation. Jesus Christ, our Lord, he never falters. And if you want to build your house, you build it on wisdom, understanding, and knowledge. That's how the house is built. Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it. In other words, everything about the building of your house revolves around the truth of the living God. Now listen.

Jesus is before Pilate. And Jesus is being questioned right before he's led off to be crucified. And as Jesus speaks to Pilate, and Pilate questions him, Pilate questions him about his kingship. Are you a king? Because you don't look like a king. I mean, if you're a king, where's your army? Where are your soldiers? Where's your kingdom? Of course, Christ explains to him, my kingdom is in this world. But I want you to notice what Christ says to Pilate.

It is the essence of his incarnation. It's the reason that Jesus came to earth. Listen to what Jesus says as he speaks to Pilate in John chapter 18, verse number 37.

He says, for this, I have been born. And for this, I have come into the world. What is that, Lord? One thing, to testify to the truth. That's it. That's the reason for the incarnation. That's the reason God became man. That's the reason we celebrate Christmas. For this reason, I was born. And for this reason, I have come into this world. And there's only one reason. Here it is, Pilate. You're before the highest man in politics. What are you going to tell him? You're going to tell him, I came to testify to the truth.

The truth. The truth about everything that was said in the Old Testament is absolute true. Everything about a coming Redeemer is true. That's me. Everything about the coming ministry of that Redeemer, it's true. It's me. That's why all the miracles. That's why all the messages that I gave. Everything that was promised is true in me. I came to testify to the truth. My friends, I cannot impart to you enough that the most important thing you have in your home is in your hand today, your Bible. The word of the living God.

It is the living, active word of God. It's what builds your home. You can't build it with anything else. You can have a lot of money. You can make it look nice. You can make it smell nice. But you're not going to have the home filled with all kinds of pleasant riches. Why? Because that deals with character. That deals with the things that matter, that last for eternity. In fact, it says in Proverbs 23, verse number 14, know that wisdom is thus for your soul. If you find it, then there will be a future and your hope will not be cut off.

Christ says, I've come to testify to the truth. So what does he do? He gives us the spirit of truth, John 14, who leads us where? Into all truth. Why? Because everything about life that matters is wrapped in truth. It's all about the truth. See? So it's imperative that you instruct your children in the truth of the living God. It's imperative that you pay close attention to the truth. It's imperative that you articulate the truth. It's imperative that you adore the truth. Why? Because everything about your life is focused on one thing, and that is the truth of the living God.

I can't impress it upon you enough. It's everything. And that's why Christ says, look, I'm gonna tell you why I'm here.

One reason to testify to one thing, the truth. Because I am truth. I am the way, the truth, and the life. So I'm gonna give my spirit, who's the spirit of truth, to lead my men in the ways of truth so they in turn can communicate that truth to next generation after generation after generation so others will walk in truth. For John said, I had no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. No greater joy than that. So everything is about the truth. How important is this? Do you know what?

You don't have to teach your children how to lie or to deceive. That comes naturally. Did you know that? But you gotta teach them to tell the truth. And you gotta teach them about truth. That doesn't come naturally. Listen to Psalm 58. The wicked have been estranged from the womb. At birth they go astray, speaking falsehood. So you don't have to teach your children to lie and deceive. They're really good at that. But you gotta teach them the truth. So how important, how important is the truth to your family?

How important is the truth to a nation? Listen to these words in the book of Jeremiah. I came across this this past week in my reading. I thought to myself, this is astounding. Jeremiah is the weaving prophet. Jeremiah is proclaiming the truth to the land of Israel, to Judah, before they go into Babylonian captivity. Right before they go in. It's almost like a last ditch effort to get them to turn and repent. Now God has already prophesied the 70 years of captivity. It's gonna come. But yet God in his grace and mercy always promises to relent when man repents.

Right? So listen to this. Jeremiah 5 verse number 1. God says to Jeremiah, roam to and fro through the streets of Jerusalem and look now and take note and seek in her open squares if you can find a man.

If there is one who does justice, who seeks truth, then I will pardon her. Jeremiah, I want you to go through the market square. I want you to go through the streets of Jerusalem. And I want you to seek for one man, just one, not two, not a family, not a synagogue. I want you to look for one man who seeks justice, who seeks truth. Just one. All you gotta do is find one. If you find one, I will pardon the city. I will pardon the nation. Just one. Oh Lord, verse 3. Do not your eyes look for truth? You have smitten them, but they did not weaken.

You have consumed them, but they refused to take correction. They have made their faces harder than rock. They refuse to repent. Jeremiah says, this is why he weeps. Lord, you've given them calamity. You've put them in distress. You've tried to get them to repent, and they refuse. They've only hardened their hearts all the more against the truth. So this is what he surmises. Verse 4. Then I said, they are only the poor. They are the foolish, for they do not know the way of the Lord or the ordinances of their God.

I will go to the great men and will speak to them, for they know the way of the Lord and the ordinances of their God. Surely it's only the poor foolish people who have refused and hardened their neck against the truth. Surely it's only those on the outskirts who don't have what it takes. But the high class people, the great people, the religious establishment, or the civic leaders, surely they seek truth. Surely they want to obtain justice. So I'll go to the great men of the city. Verse 5. But they too with one accord have broken the yoke and burst the bonds.

There's nobody. There's not one person in Israel who seeks justice and truth. Not one. So God says, why should I pardon you?

Verse 7. Your sons have forsaken me and sworn by those who are not God's. When I fed them to the full, they committed adultery and trooped to the harlot's house. That's why it's so important for parents to instruct their children. Why? Because the children of these adults were taught by foolish liars and deceivers. Not people committed to the truth. So their children didn't walk in truth. So should I pardon you? Because you didn't teach your children the truth? And now look what they're at. They're committed immorality.

Adultery. Harlotry. This is their lifestyle. We don't blame God for what he's done. God is a just and holy God. He's the God of truth. But he's just looking for one person that speaks truth and seeks justice. Jeremiah could not find one. So Jesus says, you know why I came?

I came because I'm the God of truth. And I came to testify to the truth. So much so that I'm gonna give you the spirit of truth so you can walk in truth, love truth, and understand the truth. And parents, we had this huge responsibility to instruct our children in the ways of the truth. That's it. That's all God wants us to do, to raise our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, that they might understand the importance of truth. So Solomon says to his son, listen, I grew up in the palace.

You're my son. You're now in the palace because I'm the king that succeeded my father. As I grew up in the palace and I had all these brothers around me, I realized that my father would teach them the truth of the scriptures, but they didn't listen.

I listened. I want you, my son, to listen. Because if you listen, and you acquire wisdom, and you gain understanding, and you increase in knowledge, you'll be protected and guided and watched over by the truth itself. And your life, your life will be vibrant because it will be governed by the God of truth. Parents, this is our responsibility. Ours, no one else's. Listen, I don't care which culture you are from. Your culture cannot dictate how you raise your children unless that culture is Christ-centered.

Please remember that. People say to me all the time, well, you know, in this culture, in the Hispanic culture, in the Asian culture, in the white culture, in the black culture, in this culture, we do it this way, we do it that way. Who cares? What does God say how you should do it? It's all that matters. It doesn't make a difference where you're from, what language you speak. The word of God goes across the board to everybody on how to raise our children, how to nurture them, care for them, love them, but most importantly, how to teach them the things that matter.

Truth. That's why Solomon says my favorite, well, my second favorite verse, Proverbs 23, 23, By truth, never sell it.

Gain wisdom, understanding, and knowledge. Just never sell out the truth because it's all that matters. I pray with you. Father, thank you for today. Thank you for all that you do. You're a great and mighty God. You've granted us this opportunity. Our children have been so good this morning. They've sat so quietly. Thank you, Lord, for allowing them to be in here for this brief, this brief moment. We pray, Father, for our parents. Yesterday cannot be changed. Last year cannot be changed, but tomorrow can.

And our parents can do great things for your kingdom by raising their children in the ways of God and teaching them the truth. Go before them. Give them strength and wisdom to be the parents you need them to be for the glory of your kingdom. In Jesus' name, amen.